A Peak Inside My Mind

The Key to My Heart

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 07:09:00 +0000

After considering some experiences and taking time to look inside myself, I better understand my sources of attraction and what kind of things would make me truly want to love someone. The key to my attraction and my heart (or at least a decent portion of it) is as follows:

My attractions

1) Femininity: Feminine girls are very attractive to me. Skirts, earrings, lipstick, or mascara/eyeliner can all easily score a girl extra points.

2) Boldness: It's nice to see a girl who stands out and who isn't afraid to communicate or express herself. It shows that she is confident and not bound by the false precepts of modern society. Yeah, that's hot. Also, it's nice to see a girl who is bold enough to show affection in public. I'm not saying that I enjoy watching people make out, but it is nice to see people who essentially say "I love you, and I don't care who knows."

3) Class: I'm a perfectionist of sorts, so I'm more likely to be interested in girls who are trying to be their best in every way. This often comes across as class in the attributes that can be easily seen. A girl with class holds herself to higher standards, and it's definitely obvious in the way she acts and present herself.

When I feel loved

If you are familiar with the idea of the 5 love languages, then mine would be physical touch and service. I really feel like a girl cares about me when she goes out of her way to do something special. Any kind of service says that she cares enough to give me her time and do something for me. Whether it's taking time to look her best for me, a surprise plate of cookies, or a specially planned night, I definitely appreciate it and it makes me feel closer. As far as physical touch, I love it when my back is scratched or my arms caressed. A kiss is nice, but an unexpected stolen kiss is even better. I guess it comes down to letting me know that she is really interested. In my relationships I try to make the people I date as happy as I can. I plan extravagant dates, always try to look my best, surprise her with gifts and flowers, try to shower her in sincere compliments, etc., etc. Really, I would do just about anything for someone I cared about and it's nice to know that all that effort is worth something and to see the girl respond with some effort of her own. Any relationship with unequally devoted participants is bound to fail. I like to put a lot into a relationship and expect a lot out.

Lessons learned

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 06:19:00 +0000

With another relationship come and gone, I feel a bit wiser and more prepared for future relationships. The lessons learned this time are simple, but important:

1) There's no such thing as a perfect relationship. You have to make it work and overcome concerns together. Willingness and effort are more important than trying to find someone perfect.

2) My current idea of an ideal relationship is as follows: Each person gives their best and tries to make the other person happy. In return, both find they have the best and that they are happy.

3) You have to be willing to give your heart and do whatever it takes to be together.

On top of that, I might add something like girls are confusing and don't make much sense, but that would probably just get me in trouble.

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 16:03:00 +0000

I used to think a sky diving accident was the way to go - one last hurrah followed by a quick ending. Now I realize one flaw in that theory. Not many old people go sky diving, which means that you would die young. Yeah, sky diving is no longer the way to go. Anyway, I have to get to the airport... hopefully this won't be my last post. See you later!

Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 16:05:00 +0000

A couple weeks ago I added some quotes to my facebook profile. I just didn't have any quotes that I really liked up until that point (except maybe some things that friends had said in passing, like "As long as there are children there will be cages" -Jason Williams), but those kind of quotes are more for my personal satisfaction. Without further ado, here are the two quotes I added:

The first on is by an ancient Iranian poet. Given how long ago it was written and that it had to be translated, I find it quite amazing that it managed to maintain its beauty.

Even after all this time
The sun never says to the earth, "You owe me."
Look what happens with a Love like that!
—It lights the whole Sky.
-Hafiz

The next quote is from a lady who was working as the only doctor at a science facility in the South Pole. She diagnosed and treated herself for breast cancer while she was isolated from other medical help during the harsh winter months when no one could enter or leave the facility. She ended up surviving and went on to live a very fulfilling life of service and adventure until she passed away recently.

More and more as I am here and see what life really is, I understand that it is not when or how you die but how and if you truly were ever alive.
- Dr. Jerri Nielsen FitzGerald

Ah, what the heck. Here's another Jason Williams gem:
"Even if it was to an elf maiden, I still wouldn't get married unless it was in the temple."
-Jason Williams

Good ol' Jason... =)

Cancun, Part II

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 03:47:00 +0000

(For for the first part, go to http://apeakinsidemymind.blogspot.com/2009/06/day-1-o-mexico.html)

Wednesday morning we woke up. For the most part this day was unplanned. We had the morning and afternoon to explore Cancun and see what it was really like. Unfortunately, it turns out that it is a commercial city for tourists, so we ended up just wandering malls and tourist trap sights. It was fun, but it is something that we could have done just about anywhere. In the evening we decided to try some authentic Mexican food rather than our usual meals, which consisted of McDonalds or a grocery mart, or anything cheap and safe. An authentic meal was a bad idea. Both of our dishes were extremely hot. My friend described his meal as pain spread between two tortillas. he managed to finish about 1/6th of his dish. My meal was about the same, but I continued to eat despite the unbearable burning. I've never been a fan of horchata, but I was glad to order one that night to help extinguish the intense burning, if only for a few seconds. During those seconds of only semi-burning I was able to hurry and take another large bite and begin chewing it before the pain became unbearable again. I finished my meal, quickly paid, then went in search of ice cream. Ah, back at Mcdonalds again... The burning was just the beginning. It was followed by nausea, stomach cramps, and wishing we didn't eat there. In the evening we enjoyed night fishing out on the ocean. I caught a pretty decent fish, took a lot of pictures, and really had a lot of fun. Then they cooked up the fish we had caught, along with some vegetables, and served a late meal. If it hadn't been for my previous meal, I probably would have enjoyed this one better. Still, I love the ocean, I love the waves, I love the smell, and I love the wind. It makes me think that I belong on the water.

Thursday morning I awoke to the sensation of extreme stomach cramps and aches. Stupid delicious cheesy way-too-hot burrito thingy... After that passed, we had another day of freedom, which we spent in the beautiful ocean just outside of our hotel, and exploring Cancun again. In the afternoon we took speed boats out into the ocean. We passed through jungles and mangroves on the way, and then stopped for snorkeling in one of the reefs. It was fun passing the locals and seeing them play in the rivers and oceans. It was a very foreign experience. In the reef we saw a number of fish, including some yellow sting rays. the best part, however, was following some squid. SQUID ARE FREAKIN' AWESOME! They put their tentacles together and swim like fish. In fact, at first I thought they were fish with fake eyes in the back of their heads to scare off predators, then I saw them swimming the other direction too and I thought they were cool fish that could swim both ways, but then they opened their tentacles! I tried chasing them and swimming under after them to see if they would spray ink, but I didn't have any luck with that.

On Friday, we woke up and headed out to the Island Mujeres. Once we arrived there, we got talked into buying some souvenirs, then we went snorkeling. This time we went snorkeling in a current, so we could just float along. The best part was diving down towards the flora (or whatever it was) that instantly pulled itself in and disappeared when you tried to touch it. When I saw it, I would dive under and wave water at it just to watch. I like the simple joys in life. =) After snorkeling we enjoyed a buffet and then went on a golf cart tour of the island. We saw some extreme poverty, which is really sad, but we also saw a lot of cool areas and visited the east most part of Mexico. There were also tons of wild iguanas.

Saturday we traveled towards the center of Mexico. We had to take two buses (one of which was over an hour long without any stops), and then we got on a shuttle and went even further. After about 3 hours of travel we arrived at a jungle adventure place. We rode in the back of a stripped down truck through rugged jungle trails. We could see the engine and frame of the truck and it bounced up and down as we drove through winding jungle paths. It felt like we were in an Indiana Jones movie. We rode a zip line, repelled into a cenote, then took a zipline into a cenote (landing in the water). Afterwards I went back and rode the zipline again, only this time I went down backwards. Next we got to snorkel through a cenote, which is a freshwater sink hole. It's like a long underground cave that is full of water and splits into tunnels that go for miles. You could probably travel through most of Mexico through cenotes. That was perhaps the best part. Next we rode a "sky cycle" through the jungles and some caves. I took a lot of really cool pictures and actually saw one of those birds with the big tail feathers that used to represent the feathered serpent of the Mayans. On the way back, while standing in the back of the Indiana Jones style truck, my camera bounced out of my pocket and broke open. It wasn't anything too serious, except that I lost my SD card with all of the pictures I took since Tuesday, and I didn't realize it until we were already out of the jungle and on the way back to Cancun. Losing all your pictures from a vacation in the middle of jungle isn't very cool, but I guess it helped me realize just how unattached I really am to physical things. I just shrugged my shoulders and went on.

With the exception of trying to smuggle chocolate milk through the airport (I got it through Mexico, but not the US), and meeting a cool BYU student on the airplane, that pretty much concludes my Cancun experience.

The Weekend

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 04:38:00 +0000

I went to visit my family this weekend to celebrate Father's Day. Don't worry, this isn't an annoying travel log. I'm saving that for the rest of my Mexico trip. This is just a note of a few interesting things.

On the way to my parent's house I passed a truck with a tandem bike attached to the back. I thought it was odd and decided to see what kind of cute old couple was hauling it along. When I glanced inside the truck I saw a couple (probably in their 40's or 50's) wearing matching racing gear covered in logos. That's right. As far as I could tell, they were sponsored tandem bike racers. Weird. I didn't know such a thing existed.

At church, there was a little girl in the row in front of us. She was just old enough to stand on her own, but not old enough to balance (she either had to lean against something or have someone hold her up). I was entranced by her tiny hands and I loved watching her open and shut her fingers. I love little kids. If I was her father, I probably would have spent the entire meeting playing with her. Then in the Gospel Doctrine class, the guy sitting next to me had his little girl too, and she kept making noise the entire time. She just opened her mouth and tried to talk or hum. People seemed to be getting irritated, but I couldn't help but smile. I love little kids. I imagine that when I get married, my wife will have to come tell me to stop playing with the kids and talk to her. That's a shame. I give great piggy back rides.

In the evening, our dog had a seizure. I'm understand that seizures are very common for dogs and don't generally suggest that anything is wrong. That aside, as my 19 year old brother held our dog (while he shook and drooled), I couldn't help but notice a look in the dog's eyes. He seemed both sincerely scared and worried as he didn't understand what was happening. Those aren't emotions that I generally associate with dogs. It seems like they are usually happy, apathetic, or preparing to bite someone. It makes me wonder how much deeper their emotions or even their thoughts run. Heck, maybe our dog is really a poet.

Day 1 o' Mexico

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 05:43:00 +0000

Last week was my trip to Mexico. This week was my recovery period from getting a small bug and completely changing my diet for a week (in what many would consider an extreme and bad way). That aside, I had a great time in Cancun. The first day we got there late and only had time to breath in the humidity and get used to the idea of tipping everyone who looked at us (the effect of being in a foreign tourist city, I suppose). Our first REAL day in Mexico, we headed to the ancient Mayan ruins of Chichen Itza on a tour bus, passing through several small towns and interesting places. Our first stop on the tour was at a large sink hole/underground cave known as a cenote (Mexico apparently has thousands of them, though most are undiscovered and many are linked together). You can see in the pictures below that the cenote was actually very large and interesting. It was full of stalagmites and stalagtites (there ought to be a single word to describe them both. Maybe I'll just take an academic approach and stick with "cave-thingys"), um, so yeah, it was full of cave-thingys, as well as fish and bats. You'll see the original opening in one of the pictures below. Should one fall into the opening, they would find a long drop and a hard landing, so it's generally best to be avoided.

The original entrance.

The view from the current entrance.

Proof that I was either there, or that I'm familiar with Photoshop.

The cenote from the other side.

Ditto.

After the Cenote we drove through some small Mexican towns and had lunch. I'm told that one of the dishes was iguana. I don't know if that's true, but there was a dish with fried white meat that didn't seem to be either fish or chicken. In fact, it was somewhere in between (however, fishy-chicken is MUCH better than fishy-beef. Always avoid alligator sausage...). Following lunch we headed to Chichen Itza, which is one of the most famous and most spectacular of all the Mayan ruins. The large pyramid reflects the Mayan calendar with a total of 365 steps and the larger levels representing the months of the Mayan Calendar. We also saw the famous ball court where the Mayans would try (in two teams of three) to shoot a rubber ball through a small and rather high hoop without using their hands or feet. To kick the ball they would have to lunge and smack it with their knee, or they could use their hips or their head once it was in the air. The winning team had a special honor. One of the three players would have the privilege of being beheaded for their gods. I'm a very competitive person, but I think I would be ok losing at that game.

A small Mexican town.

Chichen Itza

Me in front of the pyramid for either perspective or Photoshop bragging rights.

The court where the game was played. Notice the hoops in the center of both sides.

You can see how high the hoops really are in this picture.
The Mayans were also a rather small people as far as stature goes.

A depiction of the victor being gloriously beheaded.

The place where the heads are buried.
(On the other side of it, an early archeologist carefully excavated the site using dynamite. Fast, effective, but not generally used by many archeologists. Weird...)

The court from the outside.

The first wild iguana we saw. We were pretty excited, but about 50 iguanas later, the thrill wore off.

Some of the Mayan's handiwork.

I have to wonder what this place looked like "back in the day."

The "Observatory."

I'm not sure what this place was used for, but it's cool, right?

C'est la vie!

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Fri, 08 May 2009 19:58:00 +0000

What is life? Is life to love? Is life to experience the adventures the world has to offer? Is the purpose of life to maintain one's innocence or to expand one's mind? Ought man to find someone to love, then sit back and enjoy each day hand in hand, or should we follow an unquenchable thirst, learning along the way and becoming something greater than the day before? Is there a happy medium in between where all the fruits of life are within reach?

At any rate, I'm pretty sure that life isn't to sit still and rot. If anything, that's death. You can get a head start if you want, but I'm going to keep chasing life. =)

More things I have done since school got out:

-Had unicycle lessons
-Saw X-men Origins
-Visited old friends
-Re-inspired myself and found new strength
-Found some more good Greek music
-Made enemies with the dog
-Made friends with the dog (the dog keeps changing his mind)

Let Summer Begin!

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sat, 02 May 2009 18:27:00 +0000

Ah! Finally, a break from school! That is a rare occurrence for me since I usually end up doing school over the summer. I still have a class scheduled for summer term, but spring term is free. FREE I TELL YOU! So far, I think I'm off to a pretty good start.

Things I have done since school got out:

-Flew a helicopter (you can see a short video on facebook, but that was before I flew it. We were still going over the controls and how everything worked at that point. It was a fun and a nice spontaneous event).

-Had my first Five Guys Burgers and Fries.

-Began planning an amazing vacation (it's looking like Hawaii at this point since Cancun got hit by the Swine Flu, but I'm still keeping my options open. Any ideas?).

-Visited my family and spent some time in Syracuse.

-Said goodbye to some good friends who have finished up school and are moving on.

-Had my first BLT (yeah, odd that it would take this long, right? I hated tomatoes growing up and couldn't stand to eat them until I was forced to consume a large bowl of them on my mission. Now I really like them.)

-Attended a concert.

-Went to the gym (it had been too long... Come on six pack!).

-Got somewhat caught up at work.

-Played with my little brother and made up bedtime stories for him.

That's all that comes to mind at the moment, but I'm sure a lot more are to come! Plus, I have some good plans in the making. Road trip, anyone?

Do you really believe that?

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 29 Mar 2009 07:25:00 +0000

People are gullible. Really gullible. I have to think that part of it comes from a lack of education and a lack of critical thinking (which definitely explains why both of those things are so important). I just got another message on facebook saying that facebook has gotten too slow from having too many members (really? Come on, people! Do you actually believe that?) and that I needed to send that very message to 15 people to show that I'm an active user so that my account wouldn't get deleted in two weeks! I guess it makes sense... I mean, if they wanted to see if my account was active they could just check the last time I logged in, or send an official message to everyone, but having an email chain get sent around where everyone sends it to 15 people sounds reasonable too... oh wait, no. No, it doesn't. Also, did you know that facebook is going to start charging?! A random group that I was invited to join says so! After all, facebook isn't making NEARLY enough money, and there's no way that a competitor could gain ground if facebook started charging! Did you know that if enough people join a certain group, then facebook agreed to change back to the previous layout? Actually, there are a lot of groups that got that same agreement from facebook! The internet said so, right inside of those group invitations, and the internet never lies. Ever.

I also have to laugh at all the tests that are on facebook. I'm always getting invited to take tests that are "scarily accurate." How can a test that determines which 80's movie I am be "scarily accurate?" What is that even based on? Not reality, I can tell you that much. Basically, someone sat down with a list of possible outcomes, made up a few questions, then assigned the outcomes. They have no meaning, no significance, and they are about as accurate as the M.A.S.H game we used to play on the bus during elementary school field trips. (I guess that could be defined as "scarily accurate" too.)

It doesn't stop with facebook, though. I knew people at work that convinced themselves about all kinds of absurd things. One day they told me that they had a method to determine any truth. It was easy, you just had to choose two possible options, close your eyes, and wait to see which direction the cosmic forces of the universe caused you to lean. The option associated with that side was the answer, and it was ALWAYS correct! (or, so they believed). So, I devised a simple test and asked them to test their hypothesis. It failed miserably (of course).

I can't help but think that if people would step back and actually think about what they are doing and saying every now and then, they might have a clearer vision of reality. Does the idea in question make any sense? Is it plausible? What's the source of this new information? (and no, 'Bob' and 'Jane' don't count. Where did they get it from? What's the original source?). I'm always surprised at how gullible people can be. Perhaps the mark of an educated person should be that they don't fall for so many lies so easily.

Like an Animal...

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 18:33:00 +0000

So, I was sitting in my box, formally known as the Cadem Lab, when I felt the pangs of hunger. So, I got up, went to the food dispenser, and got a package of the usual dry preserved nutrients (aka, wheat thins - the closest thing they have to healthy food in the vending machines). Afterwards I headed back up to my box, stopping by the water dispenser to get a drink. Dang. I kinda feel like some sort of small domesticated mammal - living in a box, eating food pellets, and drinking from the communal water source. At least no one locks the cage...

Life is SOOOO beautiful!

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 18:38:00 +0000

I love days like these, days when I can miss the bus and not care because I get to wait outside where it's so wonderful. Days when my only regret is not having an ocean to blow salty air in my face. Days when I feel like I could just stand outside, close my eyes, and be happy forever.

I love waking up in the morning to a soft, warm sun, with birds singing just outside my window. For once, the morning doesn't seem to come too soon. And the morning seems to last all day too. When night finally comes, I'm greeted with a starry sky, a cool breeze, and a slice of metaphorical cake. I love when I can sleep on top of covers, with the air from the fan gently caressing my skin. My dreams are sweet, and I breath nothing but hope.

Dislikes and Probably-shouldn't-likes

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 07:25:00 +0000

Things I don't like

Brow furling: Everywhere you go people are, to use the scientific terms, furling their brows or crinkling their noses. It's mostly habitual, and almost always out of place. I might argue that it's not good for your skin and that it can cause premature wrinkling, but it goes a lot further than that. When people furl their brows, it denotes a high level of stress, surprise, or worry. When one crinkles his or her nose, it suggests confusion, extreme concentration, or uncertainty. So, if you are in the testing center with 10 minutes left before your midterm ends and you are only half way through, or if you are performing open heart surgery, go for it. Furl and crinkly away. But when you are walking down the sidewalk, reading a book, or having a casual conversation, maybe you could try expressing contentment or smiling instead.

Grocery carts being left everywhere: I always hate parking at a grocery store right next to a bunch of carts because people decided to use them, but not to return them to any of the conveniently located cart stalls that have been placed around the parking lot. It doesn't take much effort to put the cart away, and it will save a lot of cars from being dinged up. Besides, if someone uses a cart, they should be able to be responsible. Most of us are adults, right? I mean, technically? Or at least legally?
The last time I went to get groceries, as I was parking my car, the lady in the parking spot next to me unloaded her groceries, then pushed her cart to the side and got in her car to drive away. I got out of my car and pushed her cart to the stall two spaces down while she was watching, then walked into the store. I didn't want to make her feel embarrassed, but I do want to her realize how easy it is to put her cart away and maybe start doing it in the future.

Midterms always being on the same week: I think this one is pretty self-explanatory. It would be nice if professors realized that almost everyone plans their tests for the same week, then mixed it up a bit.

Things I like that I probably shouldn't

Being turned down for dates: The last time I got turned down for a date, the girl had just gotten into a serious relationship and tried to politely side-step the issue. I realized what was happening, and decided that I get an answer before I left. I knew what she was going to say at that point, but I just wanted to hear her say "no." I'm not sure what it is, but I'm guessing that I just enjoy the shear honesty. Besides, any time I ask a girl out, I realize that there is a chance she will decline (otherwise it would be demanding a girl out and not asking a girl out, right?), and I wouldn't ask if I wasn't prepared to face the consequences.

Sticking my hands in scalding hot water: I don't really care for getting burnt or using water that is far too hot, but when it happens I usually go back for more, thrusting my hands through the extremely hot water for a split second just to feel the shocking sensation of the painful heat.

I like eating strange and foreign things. If I go to a restaurant and they have something odd or exotic, there's a good chance that I'll order it. As far as the strangest thing that I've eaten so far, I'm not really sure. Not much comes to mind at the moment. Let's see... I've eaten kidney (though I don't know from what animal), a bowl of chicken livers, cow tongue, octopus, bear (You know what would be cool? Watching a bear and a big octopus fight... Or maybe a superhero who gets his powers by having his DNA crossed with bear and octopus DNA... The Adventures of Octobear! I foresee a new comic strip!). Come to think of it, clams are pretty freaky, although fairly common in the U.S.

Life...

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 20:56:00 +0000

For all of my dedicated fans who have been staring at their computer screens for the past three weeks, hitting the refresh button over and over again, I have broken the silence! Actually, that would be kind of creepy... Anyway, I just had a thought re-emerge and decided to take a break from studying to put it to words.

It seems that most people want nothing more in life than to fall in love, start a career, buy a house, raise children, and grow old. I admit that a lot of these things are appealing to me and I expect to do all of them at some point (except grow old. I decided long ago to never get fat, go bald, or grow old), but for me the world is far too vast. There are too many things to learn, too many things to do, and too many places to see.

Right now I am constrained by work and school to stay where I am, but I'm still traveling and expanding myself through other means. When I somehow find myself with a few minutes of spare time, I like to pick up one of my instruments and play or write a song and develop my musical abilities. At school I am studying things that increase my opportunities in life, both professionally and recreationally. This summer when I actually have some time, I plan to see a bit of the world (Mexico or NYC, anyone?), perhaps buy a motorcycle and go on a few road trips, and I'm still planning on the sky diving that I somehow missed last summer.

After I graduate I would like to see more of the world. I'm considering some of the classics (like a huge road trip or backpacking through Europe), but I would also love to live in some more tropical places and maybe in Europe for awhile. England might be a good option since it wouldn't be too foreign to be called home and yet has easy access to many other countries and cultures...

At any rate, I can't see myself just settling down very easily. I have too much thirst for adventure and too much desire to try new things. While I don't have any phobias or intense fears, if I had to list my 3 biggest fears (while quite small) I might say something along the lines of getting hit in the eye with something, being 30+ and single (no offense anyone), and ending up with a stagnant life. Anyway, life is meant for living.

Am I missing something here? Am I not giving the traditional life enough credit? Or maybe it's to each his (or her) own?

Every day a new adventure...

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 02:01:00 +0000

Friday was my brother's wedding, and unlike most weddings, this one was a day of adrenaline, danger, high speed car chases, illegal activities, and it was nearly the death of me. So, prepare for a tale to end all tales! This is the story of my brother's wedding:

It was early Friday afternoon. I was nearly to the temple, and I was running just a little behind schedule. The wedding was supposed to start at 12:09, and I was told to be there by 11:30 (for good measure). Due to a slight traffic jam where cops had pulled somebody over in an area that was already slow because of construction, it looked like I would be arriving at about 11:40. It wasn't as early as I hoped, but I still had plenty of time.

Driving up the steep, long road to the Bountiful temple, I couldn't help but think that it was REALLY out there in the middle of nowhere. It was a beautiful place, and it was probably best to have it out there, but it was still a little inconvenient. But who cares? I had plenty of time, and it would make for a wonderful wedding.

As I entered the parking garage, I saw my father's car, and what looked my aunt's SUV and my cousin's car, all parked side by side. I parked next to them, smiling, and walked into the temple. As I entered the marriage waiting room, I looked around and realized that I didn't recognize anyone. I asked the attendant if there was another waiting room. There wasn't. She checked the schedule. There was no wedding scheduled for "Hansen." There had been some kind of miscommunication. It was then 11:50, and I was in the wrong temple! It was like a nightmare come true, except I wasn't naked, and there was no pop-quiz, or anything like that.

I ran back to my car. On closer inspection I realized that the car I had parked next to was not, in fact, my father's car. I grabbed my phone and started calling everyone I knew who could tell me where the wedding was. No one answered. Oddly, it seemed like they were all somewhere where they couldn't talk or answer a phone. Finally I got a hold of my cousin, who being unendowed, would most likely be waiting outside.

I asked him:

"Hey, I'm trying to get to the wedding! Are you there?"
"Yeah, I'm here."
"Great! Which temple is it at?"
"Um, I don't really know. Hold on, I'll ask my mom. and call you back."
(Since he's from Colorado, I could understand if he didn't know which temple it was in Utah).
I waited for his call, pacing nervously back and forth. Finally, my phone rang.

"Hey, she didn't answer her phone."
"What?! Just ask somebody there!"
"Dude, I'm in Colorado."
"..." (AAAAAAAAAH!!!)

I frantically began making more calls. Finally, I got a hold of someone at work who had an invitation, and found out that it was the Salt Lake Temple.

It was now 12:00. The wedding was at 12:09. I was in Bountiful. I needed to be in Salt Lake. I was the best man. He was my brother. What do you do? Sit down and cry? Nah, that's not my style. Mexico... I could flee to Mexico...

Seeing as how I don't speak Spanish, and Canada is so far away, I decided to give Salt Lake a shot. The road began to transform before me. Instead of being a winding residential road with double lines and a speed limit of 35 MPH, the road somehow changed into a freeway with a speed limit of 65 MPH and a single striped white line. Old folks on their way home from the temple were giving me odd looks. Soon I was on the real freeway. The signs that used to read "Speed Limit 65 MPH" Now read "Speed Limit 95 MPH."

I was panicking, I was stressing, my heart was beating. Somehow driving had become a cardiovascular exercise. I thought I was most likely going to be dead one way or another, so I kept going. I arrived at Salt Lake, flew off the exit, and headed towards the temple. I couldn't find any parking anywhere. I was about to try driving backwards down one of the roads, but saw an opening ahead and settled for a U turn. I found a parking garage, and stopped in the first empty space I found... even if it was specially reserved 24 hours a day.

I ran up the ramp from the garage, not caring to search for the pedestrian exit, and sprinted for the temple. It was 12:22. I may have held the new land speed record at that point for traveling from Bountiful to Salt Lake, but it wasn't enough. I began running a circle around the temple trying to find the entrance. I realized that I probably had to enter the temple from the newer addition, but decided to ask someone just to make sure. I couldn't waste a second! I finally made my way to the entrance, and through the temple (probably going faster than I should have). I entered the wedding ceremony just as they were starting. I was bright red, sweaty, and gasping for air... but I was there!

The rest of the day went pretty well. I was still experiencing some post-traumatic stress, but the dinner was great, my speech was enjoyed by all, and the toast was beautiful. The reception was also very excellent. Even though everything worked out pretty well, I suppose it would have been best to be prepared. So, in preparation for next time something like this happens, I think I'm going to start brushing up on my Spanish.

έναν άλλο καιρό, μια άλλη ζωή

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sat, 17 Jan 2009 17:56:00 +0000

I just watched a video from the Athens Olympics... I saw a lot of old friends that I haven't spoken to in years. Once more I saw the early morning hours of the Olympic complex before the sun arose. I watched our performances, heard familiar sounds, and saw familiar sights. I remembered the smells. It smelled like summer. I remembered the feelings we had. It was a different time and yet everything was perfect. It was beautiful.

Και τώρα νοσταλγώ...

Torn in two all too often.

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 17:38:00 +0000

Le cœur a ses raisons que la raison ne connaît pas.
"The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing of."
-Blaise Pascal

η ζωή είναι εκεί που δε μετράει η λογική.
"Life is that place where logic doesn't count"
-Αμμος, <<επαφή>>

Sometimes I am torn apart inside. Sometimes my mind and my heart battle, disagreeing on which course to take. In a perfect world, the heart and mind would always be in perfect unison. The smart decision would also be your passion. You would long for the things that also seem right or logical.

I hear people say "if I was smart, I would do (...), but I really don't want to." Is that wrong? Is there another way? When you have two choices, do you pursue the one your mind finds pleasant, or do you take the path your heart is seeking?

The mind won't support things which are fleeting and prone to failure.
The heart won't support things unless they promise happiness.
Do you choose stability, or fleeting joy? Isn't there a point where the two can meet?

What about when love doesn't make sense, but something inside of you keeps calling out to make it work?

What about when love makes perfect sense and seems heaven sent, but something inside of you isn't happy?

Why does this occur so often and for so many people?

Why don't the heart and mind agree? Do they both see different things, or maybe need different things?

"In a perfect world, the heart and mind would always be in perfect unison."

So what do you do in an imperfect world when your heart and mind disagree? Do you run away and look for something or someone that calls out to both entities? That is usually my recourse, and it tears me in two since when you look for something else that satisfies both your logos and your pathos, neither is satisfied and one is always torn away from that which it hopes for.

I can't imagine following something that my heart isn't in, but can I really justify following something that my mind won't support?

"In a perfect world, the heart and mind would always be in perfect unison."

But here I am, living in an imperfect world, and my mind and heart are rarely in perfect unison. If I won't choose to follow one or the other, I am usually left with nothing, and neither is satisfied. Is it ok to follow your heart against your better judgment? Should you do that which seems most correct, even if your heart isn't interested? Is choosing one or the other better than being left alone and empty handed, or does hope come into play, promising a future where both heart and mind find what they long for?

Answer my question, if you can.

Body Worlds

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 06:55:00 +0000

Today I went to Body Worlds, an exhibit where they show different displays of the human body that have been preserved through a process called plastination. It was interesting, inspiring, and thought provoking. Here are a few of my thoughts:

The Human Body is Amazing:

Our bodies are so complex (and on many different scales) that it's hard to comprehend the perfect balance and brilliant composure. All of the organs work and fit together perfectly to make living creatures that can move, think, and create. The organs are also surprisingly perfect. The interior of the small intestine, for example, is much larger than one might believe when looking at the small exterior. The interior is full of ripples that maximize the surface area, allowing the small intestine to accomplish much much more. (Think of it as stuffing a sheet inside of a hose. The hose has a rather small circumference, but if you were to cut it open, remove the sheet, and stretch it out, it would cover a large area. The area (the sheet) is what does all the work in the small intestine). All of the organs of the body fit together like pieces of a puzzle, and they support each other as well. The heart delivers blood to the lungs, the lungs provide oxygen for the blood, the blood delivers nutrients to the muscles, the muscles provide food for the digestive system, and the digestive system delivers those nutrients to the blood. The human body is amazing.

God is Amazing:

It's one thing to look at the wonders of the human body and admire them, it's another thing altogether to engineer such a creature. Not only did God create all living things, but it must have been done by designing the genetic code that would produce the desired results. How does one write the genetic coding that will create a human being in all its glory and amazing systems? How do you decide to create a bird, a whale, a lion, or any animal, and then make the genetic coding that will constantly generate the designed animal despite generations of changes to the coding? It's beyond both my comprehension and the talents of mother nature.

Our Journey:

One segment of the exhibit featured fetuses in different stages of development. The human fetus at 8 weeks is stunning. It is smaller than the tip of my pinky, yet has eyes, a mouth, arms and legs, hands and feet, each one with five fingers or toes. Even more unbelievable was the realization that I used to be there, that I was once a tiny, helpless fetus that was so small and fragile. It is amazing that something like that can grow into a strong and intelligent man or woman. If we didn't already know the end from the beginning, we might not believe it. I suppose that when we look at how great and marvelous God is, compared to the frailty and simple mindedness of mankind, one might not believe the potential that we have. Even as the little fetus can grow into something so much greater, we too can exceed our current bounds and become like God.

I can barely walk...

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 08:31:00 +0000

Yesterday I bought a new sled, and I'm glad to say that it's amazing. When sledding with some other people, my sled was considerably faster, and constantly slid about twice as far at the bottom of the hill as all the other sleds. That may have posed a problem, though, tonight.

My friend John and I went sledding in Rock Canyon park. The snow had fallen perhaps a week before, then had been repeatedly melted, refrozen, and compacted by other sledders. Consequently, Rock Canyon park was essentially a large bowl of hard ice. John and I began by sledding down the hill that was closest to where we had parked. It was pretty much amazing, but we were drawn to the hill on the opposite side of the park that seemed to be much higher and somewhat steeper.

At first we had trouble even climbing the hill. It was too steep and too slick to walk up, and we had to try sprinting up different parts. After a few failed attempts of trying to climb the hill and then sliding back down on our feet, we were able to find a good spot to climb up where someone had walked and left footprints back when the snow was still soft. We flew down the hill, and my sled was probably able to slide an additional 75 or 100 feet after reaching the base of the hill. Unfortunately there were a lot of bumps at the bottom of the hill and a few jumps that we had to avoid because we always hit them pretty hard at that speed, and our sleds didn't really provide much cushioning.

On what turned out to be my last real run, I found a spot on the hill that was very high, very steep, and had a nice smooth bottom that was completely void of bumps. The downside was that it was next to the largest jump of all, and it was a jump that everyone was trying to avoid at all costs. I figured that I probably wouldn't hit the jump, that I would be able to steer away, and if all else failed, I would be able to roll off my sled and come to a stop before I reached it. Apparently I was wrong.

As I shot down the hill, I realized that my sled was turning towards the jump. I leaned. It made no difference. As my speed continued to increase until I could barely make out what was happening around me I realized that I was in trouble. I tried to roll off the sled, but all I accomplished to do was turn the sled sideways... a rather unwelcomed event. I hit a large bump which nearly knocked me from the sled, then looked down and saw that the massive jump was moments away and thought to myself "oh, crap...". According to John, at this point everyone on top of the hill went silent and locked their eyes on the impending doom. I closed my eyes and prepared for the impact. The force was stunning. I felt a huge burst from the sled which nearly knocked the air out of me. Then all I felt was the sled disappearing from underneath me. I opened my eyes again and looked down. At this point I was standing vertically in the air facing backwards, the base of the jump was several feet beneath me and I was beginning to spin so that my feet were getting higher and I was nearly on my back. I took a moment to analyze the situation. I was screwed.

Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. Classic, eh? Then I hit the solid ground, landing on my tail bone and bouncing a couple of times until I started rolling. Eventually I came to a stop on my stomach and took a couple of minutes to lie still and relish life. Ah sweet life! I was still alive!

A minute later, John was able to regain his composure and yelled to see if I was alright. Then he came down the hill, and I slowly got up. Oh, what agony! I hurt all over! We made our way up the hill, I couldn't stop laughing, except for every time I took a step forward with my left foot, at which point a sharp stinging pain shot up my spine and made me shout and take a quick breath.

I don't know why I was laughing so hard considering the condition that I was in. I hurt all over, and every step was very intense. Still, it was hilarious.

I tend to laugh at a lot of things. When something bad happens, I often find myself laughing about it or just shrugging it off. A lot of things just aren't that important that I need to worry about them. Unless the pain is unbearable, I often just ignore it or laugh it off. I have my limits, I'm sure. Some things are too painful to laugh at, and too difficult to endure, but for everything else you might as well enjoy it!

Foreign Languages

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 23:10:00 +0000

As I was sitting in church yesterday, I found myself drifting and thinking about other things, so decided to take a different approach and started translating the lesson into Greek as it was given, like I used to do on my mission (we had a microphone and everyone was given headphones so that we could translate into either Greek or English, depending on who was speaking). That only worked for awhile, and then my thoughts started drifting again, but this time my thoughts were in Greek. As the lesson was about to end, I realized that I would be giving the closing prayer and for a moment I was struck with fear. My thoughts kept coming out in Greek and I was afraid that I would stand up and slip into Greek during the prayer (I know it's not really a valid concern, but for a split second I was ready to panic). Fortunately I had a few minutes to clear my head and get back into English thoughts, and everything went alright, of course.

In retrospect, it caused me to wonder what the value of a foreign language really is. I studied French for 5 years in junior high and high school, and I have never really needed it. My French used to be quite good, and I have been considering pulling out my old French text books and refreshing my language skills so that I could claim the title of a polyglot, but I have to wonder if there is really any point.

A lot of people make a big deal out of knowing a foreign language, but chances are that you will never really use it. Unless you plan on moving to another country or becoming a professional translator, the time you will spend using a language will be microscopic in comparison to the time you spent learning it.

Learning French DID provide me with some benefits, such as understanding better how language works, it made it easier to learn Greek, it gave me insight into a different culture, and gave me some college credit. The one thing that it didn't do is provide me with a useful language to use.

I suppose I could always try to pull the language card with girls, as many girls seem to find it attractive, but I've always tried to keep it low key. I think that a relationship should be based on better things than foreign languages that the other person can't understand. Why is it that girls like foreign languages?

I also have a lot of friends that have learned a foreign language (French being the most dominant, followed by Spanish), and as far as I know, they don't really use it, or at least don't have a need for it and only use it occasionally for fun.

I figure that I could be fluent in French in about a month if I really applied myself. Would it be worth a month of my life? Would it be a good idea to phase out languages everywhere until everyone spoke a single language, or is it better to preserve cultures? Is it really worth it to invest time, an irreplaceable resource, into learning a language that you will never use?

I suppose that I wouldn't trade my language skills now for the time that I spent learning them, well at least not my Greek. It might be nice to trade my French into some nice art skills or something, but that's not realistic. I would only want to keep my Greek because of the good memories of Greece, my friends who don't know English, and because I plan to return eventually and tour the country.

But I STI-I-I-IL haven't found...

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 04:24:00 +0000

The question has been posed, just what AM I looking for? That in and of itself is a difficult question to answer. You have to consider that there are many different levels. It's hard to determine the deeper levels without really spending time with someone. The more superficial levels are usually easier to describe (but also important, thought not as important as the deeper levels), and they are also easier to recognize when you meet someone new.

I say that they aren't as important because in the end, it's the person you [should] fall in love with, and not the pretty face. Still, I insist that it is important for several reasons. First, many people will deny it (they are lying), but looks are important in a relationship, or at least we tend to make them important. Also, I believe that you can tell a lot about a person by his or her looks. You can see how a girl carries herself, what a girl thinks about herself, how confident she is, what kind of interests she may have, etc. Also, I believe that you can look at a girl's face and determine what her most prevelant personality traits are. Does she have smile lines or frown lines? Which facial muscles are used the most? Does she stress easily, or is she easy going? Perhaps we can't always look at people and know who they are, but I think we subconcsiously recognize what type of personality people have, and we can decide if it's pleasant to us or not.

That being said, the modest are still the hottest. For me, when a girl dresses modestly, it says that she respects herself and that she recognizes that she has a lot more good qualities than just her physical body.

So, how should I answer the question? Just what am I looking for? I could start with a description of the inner person, but if you had to get to know everyone very well before you knew if you might be interested in a relationship, no one would ever even date. Furthermore, even if I knew exactly what I was looking for in that field, I couldn't realistically expect to find an exact match.

So, perhaps I should start with a description of physical attributes?

I could say that I'm a sucker for dark silky hair, but that's only sometimes. Recently I've found more appreciation than usual for curly hair as I've let go of my childhood distaste of my own curly hair, and I often see girls who are beautiful to me with different hair colors as well, so that's not it. I guess it's always changing. For example, Just the other day I saw a girl at the store who wouldn't have matched any of my preconceived discriptions. She was wearing lace up shoes that resembled the classic 80's sneakers (except they were actually knee-high boots), purple tights with a pattern, kind of ugly gym shorts, and a jacket that didn't really match anything she was wearing. She had long blond hair, with a small streak that was colored blue. It was a modest (or at least non-revealing) outfit, but it didn't really fit any social norms. Oddly, I found her style to be very attractive. Was it the level of confidence required to pull something like that off? Maybe it was the sense of freedom that encircled her. It may have just been that she was something different. Who knows? Looks just seem to be hit and miss.

I guess it's hard figure out the details, especially when they don't really exist and there are a million people who could fit the bill.

In the end, I'm just looking for a good friend, someone whom I can love beyond any comprehension and who will love me in return. Someone who will help me live life to the fullest, and keep me on the straight and narrow. Someone to share dreams with. Someone who, when I think of her, will make me want to be a better person.

Now that being said, I have a lot of attractive friends with the potential to fit that description, but we remain friends. That's ok. I value our relationships, but I still have to wonder why it is that I form a lot of good friendships with girls, but never deep relationships. Is it because I'm too cautious? Is it because I want to know that it's meant to be before I do anything, and by that time it would be too late, or our relationship would be too

comfortable just the way it was? Maybe I'm too nice of a guy and I respect women so much that I just want the best for them despite my own desires, so I try to get to know them, and then if they seem interested I can ask them out, if not we can be friends, but then girls always feel restricted by social norms and refuse to flirt or seem interested. I don't know. Maybe I'm too restrictive and I just tell myself "she is not the one" before I really get to know someone.

Then again, I have dated friends and I have dated people that I just met somewhere. I have been on dates with classmates. I have been on dates with all kinds of people. So, why so many friends and so few dates? Do I need to be more selfish and tell new people I meet that it's a relationship or nothing, that I already have enough friends? Perhaps I need to be more bold and threaten potential friendships with relationships to see what happens. Part of the Utah mentality seems to be that it's either friendship or dating, and that the lines shouldn't cross, even just for fun. (Sadly, no one has yet responded to my challenge in the dating post. I've never seen so many people turn down free ice cream, dinner, or a night on the town without any kind of commitment or expectations!)

I think the real problem is that I just don't meet many new people. I work at home, all my classes are full of guys (ah, the curse of ECEn majors), and the same people are at church every week. I have hope for the new semester. I'm taking several classes that aren't from my major, including two dance classes, a pre-med class (yeah, not many people know it, but I've been considering going to medical school after my degree for years), and a guitar class if I can get in.

So, I guess for the time being I will just keep going and see what awaits me. I'm sure that I will find that "someone whom I can love beyond any comprehension and who will love me in return. Someone who will help me live life to the fullest, and keep me on the straight and narrow. Someone to share dreams with. Someone who, when I think of her, will make me want to be a better person" eventually. Still, it wouldn't hurt to know if I was doing something wrong. Thoughts, anyone?

The Bridge

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 06:31:00 +0000

I got a special treat tonight. After driving from Provo to Syracuse, I had to drive to Roy, then to Morgan, back to Roy, then finally back to Syracuse. It probably added about two hours to my trip, but I got to visit one of my favorite places that I wouldn't have been able to see otherwise. This special place is a bridge, plain and simple, that goes over the train tracks in an old worn down part of town. The bridge in and of itself is quite unspectacular, but as I cross over the top of the bridge, everything changes. At the very peak I can see over all the houses, powerlines, and fences, and the distant horizon is unvieled. I get to see the great Salt Lake, Antelope island, mountains, and miles and miles of house tops below, if even for a split second.

As I drive up the bridge, I feel like I'm approaching the surface of a deep pool. For a brief moment, I break the surface and gasp for air, taking a deep breath before I plunge back into the world. I like to coast up the bridge, slowing down as much as possible to prolong the promised moment of freedom. For an instance, all the burdens of life are lifted. The captivity of daily life and stagnant routines is left behind, and the world is before me.

I don't know why, but I've never stopped and walked over the bridge, taking time to stand at highest point and just gaze into the distance. Maybe it's because I always passed the bridge on my way home from work, and I just wanted to finish the day and relax. Maybe it's because some things are best when they are rare, and standing at the peak of the hill would ruin the poetry that I found each evening. Maybe it's because people just don't take time to enjoy life like they should.

Someday when I build a house, I plan to have a room on top of the highest point. The walls will be made of glass, and the room will have no purpose but to sit, to glance at forever, and to be inspired.

Random Thoughts #4

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 06:54:00 +0000

-It would be nice if cars ran off cookie dough. Then it would smell amazing everywhere you went!

-"When I was younger..." is a horrible way to start a story. Really, any story you can tell about yourself happened when you were younger, unless you are telling a story about how you are telling a story right now, but that's just lame. Never tell that story. People with think you are just narrating for yourself or something.

-Why would any one get laser surgery when they could wear a monocle? Monocles demand respect! Walk into any room wearing a monocle and you are instantly cooler than everyone else.

A Few Random Facts About Me

-As a kid, I had a pet newt. I named him Gingrich.

-In 5th grade we were assigned states and told to research them then make a parade float from a shoe box for our state. Instead I decided to convert our red radio-flyer wagon into a large ridable float, complete with a model rocket "missile launcher" in the back. I got a 'B' and the teacher said something about not following directions... I still think my float was the coolest.

-My current pull up record is 33.

Who I Am

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 00:39:00 +0000

I won't claim to be normal:
-When bad things happen to me, I usually laugh in response.
-Money isn't so important to me, so long as I have enough for my needs.
-Your compliments will usually go unheard, but I want to hear your complaints. I want to know how I can do better.
-I don't generally judge others when they do something stupid or wrong. I realize that we are all imperfect and bound to make mistakes, so instead I judge them by who they are at heart, and who they are trying to be.
-When I feel sad or depressed, I use it to inspire myself.
-I try to be thoughtful and considerate of other people. I have a lot of people that I care about and want to support, yet I don't generally miss people when they are away. I never really have, even as a child.

I don't think this is how most people work, but I don't see it as a problem. In fact, it serves me well. It might sound like I would be fine in any situation, that I'm easy going enough that troubles and challenges wouldn't really affect me too much, and in many cases it's true. However, there are things that I still need. I may not need many physical things, I may not need compliments, and depression never lasts long and usually encourages me to do better, but that doesn't mean that I will always be content. There are still things that I consider to be important.

What do I need?

-I long for human touch, to know that somebody is there and cares about me.
-I need friends, I need people to pursue me, to let me know that they want to be around me.
-I stress when I feel like I might be falling short of someone's expectations. When I'm not able to do everything that people ask of me, that is that the time that I start to worry.
-I need to make people happy.

An Incredible Night, Part I

noreply@blogger.com (Blake) — Sun, 07 Dec 2008 17:59:00 +0000

My hand shook as I tried to place the key within the confines of the lock. It took more effort than usual, but it was well worth it. As I entered, I could tell that my nose would definitely be red when I looked in the mirror, and my face felt stiff and frozen. As I walked towards my room I noticed the blood on my thumb, now apparent with the absence of the band-aid, reminding me of what may have been the best meal I have had in some time. All these things were tokens of contentment and signs of freedom. It had been a wonderful night.

As I was preparing to leave for school that morning to work on some overdue assignments, I was trying to decide which activities I would to pursue that evening. I had so many good options, but not nearly enough time. After narrowing my list down to the options that interested me the most, I still couldn't decide which one to do. Then I decided to do them all. I planned an amazing night, and sent out invitations to about 20 people. I realized that by this point in the day, and during this time of the semester, most of them would probably already have plans or commitments, but I decided to try anyway. When the time finally came, only a few were able to make it.

Then there were four.

As Audryn, Katie, and Eric arrived, I began the first part of the night. Having collected a number of ingredients, we began to make a Greek meal. When you visit a Greek restaurant in America, you get American food modeled after Greek food. It's not the same, and it's not nearly as good. I prepared a Greek salad by combining cucumbers, tomatoes, onions, olives, feta cheese, and a handful of dressings and spices. Then I began preparing chicken gyros using a very large rotisserie chicken that I had purchased earlier. In all my time in Greece, I have never seen a lamb gyro. (The “Greek” lamb gyro is nothing more than an American invention.) Together we prepared toppings, fried french fries, and grilled pitas. The gyro wasn't quite 100% authentic, but it was pretty close, and better than any gyros you will find in a "Greek" restaurant. To compliment the meal, we opened a bottle of Burgundy flavored sparkling grape juice and used the fancy wine glasses next to the paper plates and plastic utensils. Audryn stayed as long as she could before she had to leave for her choir concert, and then ran out the door in a bit of a hurried panic.